Minor Mistakes
by DanielleJasperCullen
Summary: Bella a normal girl with a growing hate for her artificial mother falls in love with her new neighbor Edward Cullen. Problem is Bella's 16, Mr.Cullen is 26 with a wife. Not to mention Bella and Edward's relationship is against the law.
1. Chapter 1

Home wasn't the cherry black mahogany floor that creaked like crying birds beneath you, home wasn't the floral table cloth, ugly enough to make me lose my appetite at the dinner table. Home wasn't the rowdy children across the street with straight white teeth, and combed back hair, perfect slacks and perfect dresses, belonging to perfect people. No that wasn't home, at least not to me.

"Bella!" The voice of my mother rang through the house, the need of my assistance was clear in her warm honey voice.

Home was not a lot of things here, home was definitely not her. My mother.

I stood from my seat by the dining room window, I stood from my perfect view of perfect children. My eyes stayed down on the laces of my shoes, my head stayed bowed listening to the crying birds in the floor. Though she wasn't home, she was my mother. When she needed assistance I was to assist.

When I entered the living room my mother's eyes were on me instantly, I felt their sharp gaze on my head that immediately rose to look her directly in her sad hazel eyes, eyes like diamonds.

"Oh, I thought maybe you had left… It was so quite in here." She sat cozy on the couch her long golden brown hair like silk all rested on one side of her shoulder, an open book in her pale hands.

"No, I'm here." I stated simply, taking a seat in the rocking chair across from her.

"Don't be so quite child. Don't you speak?" She teased not so jokingly, her eyes sparkled with amusement but the grimace was clear on her perfect pink lips. I looked down at my lap instead of replying, I counted the small roses on my dress, and the lines on my fingers, the seconds it tool for her to open her mouth again.

"You know there is a man next door." She said at 12 seconds. The sigh that went through me shakes my whole body, makes chills climb my spine; it makes the birds in the floor cry with without anyone's weight on them.

"A nice man. He stopped by." She continued pretending not to hear the indifference in my sigh. I raised my head to watch her again, and this time she wasn't looking at me. Her head was turned so that she was looking out of the window behind her, she was wondering, thinking, it was clear on her face. It was like a picture out of a magazine, the sun came in through the window giving her a glow like a god that she could easily be mistaken for. I took a picture in my mind. Though I didn't think much of her as my mother, I did think she was beautiful.

"Why don't you go introduce yourself?" She suggested turning her attention back to me, I lowered my head once again counting the roses, lines on my finger and seconds.

"It would make him happy. Don't you like to make people happy Bella?" She sighed, suddenly looking very tired. From reading I suppose.

"I guess." I whispered standing from my seat on the rocking chair and excusing myself without taking anymore glances at her. I couldn't bare look at something so beautiful yet so ugly anymore.

The neighbor's house was an exact replica of ours. Nothing special about it. Nothing I would go into detail about of course.

2 floors, one balcony coming from the master's bedroom, a large window on the side of the house right across from my window and the similarities go on. The only difference was the hideous peach colored walls that almost looked orange from far away. I wondered why anyone would buy this house; I wondered why anyone bought a house. I wondered a lot of things that I would never ask out loud.

I counted my steps to his doorstep, and hummed a song I only slightly knew because I caught the ending of it when I was tuning the radio one night. I flattened out the wrinkles on my dress with the palm of my hand and sighed deeply as I reached the porch.

I knocked a total of three times, and then let my hand rest behind my back. The door swung open right as my knuckled had finished the third knock against the door, I jumped an inch back in surprise almost killing myself. I stumbled back, tripping over my own foot and stumbling over another, a hand reached out to me and caught me before I split my skull open on the cement.

"Whoa!" The voice seemed almost tiny, belonging to a fairy or an elf.

"Ow!" With the help of the strangers hand I pulled myself to balance, and held the arch of my back with my free hands. Holding myself up.

"Are you okay?" Big blue eyes filled with concerned watched me, and I stared back completely in awe. What a tiny creature she was, yet so beautiful and woman like, her beauty threw me off and felt a hundred time uglier than I already felt.

"Y-yes." I stuttered, stumbling forward once but catching myself. "I just came to introduce myself."

The tiny woman's eyes were filled with a million questions.

"I'm your neighbor ." I explained further.

"Oh!" Realization struck her, and she clapped her hands together rejoicing I suppose. Though my presence was nothing to rejoice about.

"I'm Alice!" She practically squealed sticking out her hand for me to shake. I gently put out mine accepting.

"I'm Bella." I smiled weakly, unable to shake the pleasantness about the tiny woman named Alice.

"That is so thoughtful of you to introduce yourself." She smiled widely running a hand through her slick black hair.

"My mother met your husband, I believe." I nodded towards my house briefly. "He stopped by himself."

"My husband? Well that's not like him at all!" She giggled. "This place must be getting to him."

I chuckled awkwardly, shifting my weight uncomfortably.

"Did you want to come in?" She stepped aside, but I was quick to decline this offer.

"No, no, I must be getting back. Maybe some other time." I smiled my most convincing smile, and Alice squealed in response.

"Of course! You must come over! I can already see us being the best of friends."

Alice made me smile today; Alice made me somewhat happy to be her neighbor. But when my mother asks I say she was okay. And I never change my answer not even when she asks me for the third time at dinner. Not even then.

**A/N: Pleas Review, What do you think? Should i continue?**


	2. Chapter 2

My reflection was nothing like my mother's.

There was no sparkle in my brown eyes, no sleek shine in my dull brunette hair, no glossy shine covering my pale lips. There was nothing to stare at, even just for a while. You could glance at me for a second then never turn back, never caring to take another look. Because I was just simply me, plain and dull, though the blush in my cheeks was far too red, there was no light in my face no brightness what so ever… I was so dim, almost fading. I could wear a shadow as a mask.

I had my father's looks, once said my mother who lies about almost everything I'm almost sure. I could never know myself if I looked like the man… I had yet to meet him.

"He was plain." She sighed once twirling the golden brown strands falling over her shoulder.

I was positive she was calling me plain… it was rather obvious at the time. I was only 13 then just blossoming into a young lady, just discovering the wonders of being a woman, but that ended quickly when I found nothing and got tired of looking.

Now today, I was 16. Today was my birthday and I'd be spending it alone. I wondered idly if my mother had forgotten again, and when she left just an hour ago without saying anything even closely related to birthday's ,it had been confirmed. She had forgotten, but I didn't blame her, I was such a shadow in this house I should just move out. She would forget I even lived here, that I was even hers. She would forget everything.

But for now I'll sit in my room and look for changes in the reflection, I'll look for something nice to look at. Did my breast get bigger? Did my cheek bones get higher? Was my hair any longer? I searched and searched, and maybe my lips got a bit fuller. Just a bit fuller. Enough to satisfy me. I got tired of staring at myself and let the crying birds show me out of the house and onto the porch where empty streets and a falling sun kept me company.

I held my hands in my lap as I sat on my porch alone counting the lines on my finger and the roses on my dress.

"Hey?" A tiny voice too unique to forget approached behind me, I jumped a bit in response but only raised my head once because I knew why she was approaching me, I knew why I had drawn attention to myself.

"You alright?" She came closer to sit next to me, and put her hand on my back, I tensed immediately.

"Yeah." I answered wiping away a few tears with the pal of my hand.

"Why are you crying?" Alice rubbed my back in soothing circles, I couldn't ignore her pleasantness, and it would be such a sin. I relaxed against her when she scooted closer by my side, but I didn't answer. I stayed silent.

"Did someone hurt you?" She whispered and I raised my head alarmed, looking her in her baby blue eyes I shook my head furiously.

"No, nothing like that." I sniffed bowing my head once again. She kept rubbing my back soothingly probably waiting for me to explain but I wouldn't, not on my porch in front of my house like a cry baby.

"Why don't you come inside?" I heard the smile in her voice and I raised my head to see her wide smile stretching across her face. For some reason Alice was excited by my presence and I had no idea why, but for some reason I didn't care and I let her escort me to her door way, my hand in hers.

The steam swirled so elegantly out of the mug, dancing almost. I watched it almost possessively as it danced out of the mug in front of me.

"This is nice, just you and me." Alice smiled warmly taking a sip of her coffee. Alice had made me a cup of tea and insisted I stay a while after I explained that no one was home at the moment. She seemed like the person who would talk a lot but I had a feeling she could sense I wasn't in the talking mood. I avoided her deep gaze by glancing around the dining room area, and from what I have seen their house was much like something out of a magazine, everything coordinated, everything simple patterns. Whereas my house was much like the inside of a thrift store.

"You have a nice house." I stated abruptly but my comment distracted her I could see by the flicker of emotions in her eyes. She brushed a strand of black hair back behind her ear and took a sigh before replying in a calm cool voice that soothed me from my head to my toes.

"I tried to make it nice. Edward isn't really into that stuff so it was up to me." She took a look around herself before resting her eyes back on me.

"Edward?" I asked before I could stop myself, curiosity over powers me almost all the time.

"My husband, sorry." She explained nodding slightly, then taking another sip of her coffee.

"Where is he?" I feel comfortable to ask, she seems to like talking about herself, most people do. It meant we didn't have to talk about me and I like that.

"Work, but he should be back anytime now." She glanced at the elegant silver watch on her wrist that I stared at longer than I should have. I ran out of questions, but I searched nervously for more.

"That's a nice dress you're wearing." She smiled down at my dress and I blushed several different shades of red before the involuntary smile spread across my face.

"Thank you. I picked it out myself." I smiled, and my happiness at the most simple thing seemed to surprise both of us, Alice's eyes seemed to brighten at my smile.  
"You have good taste." She laughed lightly. "Maybe one day you could see my dresses help me choose."

"I'd like that." I answered a bit too quickly but it added to Alice's happiness. We let the excitement float in the air in silence as it came down and we sat there not saying a word for a while. Alice was an easy person to talk to, but I have no one to really compare it to since I don't talk too much people especially in this neighborhood. But I was sure not everyone was this easy to please. Alice seemed unique and different even as she just sat across from me at the table, with her jet black hair in a bun on the top of her head, with strands of loose hair around her face somehow adding to her beauty.

"Why were you crying Bella?" She filled the silence in the air, her voice was soft and understanding... caring even.

"Today's my birthday." I frowned down at my cup of tea playing with the handle.

"Happy Birthday!" Alice's voice was filled with that familiar excitement.

"Thank you." I smiled at my hands.

"How old are you?" I could hear her lean forward in her seat, she was honestly interested. I shouldn't have been surprised, not everyone is as cold and low as my mother.

"Sixteen." I glanced at her quickly then back down at my tea.

"Oh that's wonderful!"

"I suppose." I shrugged, I had spoken something that should have only been thought.

"What's wrong?"

I looked up at Alice again, and her eyes had turned sad, not such a bright blue rested in her eyes and it made me want to cry.

"Nothing." I forced a smile. "I just don't like birthdays."  
"Oh you're too young for that." Alice giggled returning to her normal self. I mentally promised myself I would never do anything to put that look on her face again. I might roll over and die if I ever had to see it again.

Before I had the chance to respond the light creak of the door filled the house, along with crying birds and heavy shoes. Alice looked over my head towards the direction of the noise but I didn't even turn. I kept my eyes on my cup, trying to remember why I hate birthdays just in case she asks. My feet rested in my white flats uncomfortably and I kicked a shoe off slightly to release my aching toes, I arched my foot, then relaxed.

Arch, relax.

"In here Edward!" Alice called to the man, the grin on her face made it quite clear she was happy about his coming home, while I sat there bored and uninterested. I slipped my foot back in my flat and turned my body just a bit to watch Alice's husband enter the room. The tall, lean man blinked surprised with me sitting there he surely wasn't expecting company I suppose, then he smiled a warm smile at Alice and even though it wasn't directed at me I felt my entire body warm. I could see why Alice and Edward were together. He was perhaps even better looking than her. His bronze hair was practically a mess on his head but went so well with his crystal clear jade orbs, and his fair colored skin. The man was beautiful.

"Hello." He smiled a crooked smile at me and I forgot where I was.

"Hi." I said shortly.

"Edward, this is Bella the girl I was telling you about!" She squeaked running from the table and into his arms like a ballerina, he caught her with a chuckle and they both looked down at me like a child. I hated them both for a second. Just for a second.

"Nice to meet you Bella." He put out his hand to shake.

"Likewise." I sighed shaking his hand but never looking him in the eyes.

"Well I'll let you guys finish talking, I'll just be up stairs." He kissed Alice's cheek and smiled at me quickly before leaving to where ever he was going upstairs, I looked back at my tea not wanting to watch him leave.

* * *

Alice didn't ask about my birthday again, she got the point I didn't want to talk about it and I was grateful for that. I wouldn't have to lie to her, only when she asked about my mother or my father. I didn't have to make up some stupid reason why I wasn't with my family on my birthday. Instead Alice giggled and ranted about clothes and other things I would have never brought up at all but I didn't mind. She was funny, witty and easy to listen to with all her hand gestures, she wasn't hard to look at and there was no fake smile ever forced upon her face all genuine and true. I watched her almost amazed with her. Every now and then her husband would walk past or grab something from the kitchen or ask her for something, stealing my attention. He would glance at me but never long enough to count as looking at me, he would speak in his smooth voice and I would listen like my life depended on it. Alice was oblivious to my tenseness every time he entered the room, I was glad. I wouldn't have much fun explaining that to her.

It was about 10pm when I left home wishing I didn't have to. Alice hugged me and I hugged her back. She was my friend now. When I get home my mother smiles but says nothing and I almost waited to see if she would. And when I cry myself to sleep I remind myself to never hope again.

**A/N: Thank You for the reviews guys (: I appreciate it, please continue to tell me what you think! **


	3. Chapter 3

I laid on my back staring up at the blank ceiling hoping it would swallow me if I stared long enough, my clock on the dresser ticked away every second closer to death but sometimes I thought it wasn't moving fast enough. Heels beat the floor boards as my mother ran back and forth inside the house, preparing for something I suppose. I could care less. I stared at the bright golden ray of light that had peaked through my blinds like a fog of yellow smoke watching the dust motes dance with each other, the dances had just begun when my mother appeared at my door, cigarette in hand and her golden brown waves cascading down to her sides.

"Bella." She said sternly her eyes seeming darker than the beautiful light brown that usually sparkled in her eyes. Something was wrong and even worse it looked as if somehow it was my fault. She held her arms up on the door frame taking in a deep breath before continuing.

"Where are my cigarettes?" She tilted her head the slightest and took a step further into my room.

"Why would I know that?" I pushed myself off my back, leaning on my elbow.

"Don't play with me girl!" She stomped her heavy heals and practically killed a crying bird in the floor boards, her sudden rage made me jump in my skin. My heart beat was frantic, and sweat began to pool in my palms.

"I don't have them…" I swallowed never blinking; she bit back a sarcastic laugh as she took two more steps into my room. She closed her eyes tightly then opened them again, I saw the evil in them. I saw the blood red light flash in them, I sworn I could have heard lighting strike somewhere far in the distance, though it was day and the sun was making a lovely appearance today.

"Okay Bella…" She sighed stepping back two steps, and I exhaled in relief.

"But if things of yours go missing, I'm not sure I know where they are." With that she dramatically left my rooms mumbling under her breathe.

I stared at the door as if she was still there being crazy, I watched the door way like she was still invading my privacy and threatening me. I heard the front door slam, and assumed she left. Typical.

The day was dull as each other day seemed, I watched the sun fall from the sky and I watched the moon take over the sky and I stayed quiet and boring in my room. The Cullen's house seemed empty and lonesome today, the mahogany doors were shut tightly all day, no one seemed to come in or out and I frowned at the fact I missed Alice. I didn't have much friends here, actually close to no friends at all, everyone just stared at you and assumed different things because of your parents life style that you are forced to follow. People are always staring and always talking. I'm almost afraid sometimes to leave the house.

I peaked at the Cullen house for the billionth time today wishing someone even maybe Alice's husband would be out there doing something. But nothing happened and I touched the soft skin on my elbow, soothing myself. The moon had given the dark sky light and the street lights had flickered on. My mother was nowhere to be found still. Not that I had been looking.

After debating for 20 minutes, I slipped on my flats and decided to check for myself if the Cullen house was just that lonely tonight.

"Alice!" I called knocking on the door several times before it came swinging open, my heart jumped with excitement and a smile spread on my face… Thank god she was home. My heart fell when her husband answered the door and I stepped back blushing scarlet with embarrassment. His green eyes were curious, looking me up and down, but somehow in the most polite way. His hair was a mess again, and his green eyes must have gotten brighter, or my memory had forgotten how beautiful they really were.

"Bella." He smiled a small smile.

"Oh, I' m so sorry." I frowned running my hand through my hair loosening the tangles, my nerves getting the best of me.

"Oh no problem, anything you need? Want to come in?" He stepped aside offering me in and the offer almost made my heart stop completely.

"I-I was just looking for Alice, Mr. Cullen." I stuttered nervously biting on my lower lip.

"It's Edward." He smirked. "She's not in today; she headed out this morning to visit her mother up in Oregon. I'm surprised she didn't tell you, she must have forgotten."

"Oh, when will she be back?" I could almost feel the need to cry, my hands trembled slightly and I gripped my dress gently.

"Not for a week" Edward frowned for me, putting a hand through his messy bronze hair. I looked down at my white flats, letting the hair fall into my eyes. Disappointment flooded me.

"Hey, don't be bummed, you can come in and talk to me if you want?" Edward's voice was sympathetic and I wanted to spit on his shoes, I needed no one's pity, I already gave myself a handful of my own. It was unnecessary for him to care one bit about me being sad. He was just my neighbor.

"T-that's okay Mr. Cullen—Edward. I'll just go back home now. My mother should be coming back anytime." I lied playing with my hands behind my back.

Edward looked at me, then glanced at my dark house with no cars parked in the front, then back at me. His eyes made it clear he was conflicted with something; he shifted his weight and held the door open wider looking at me with strong eyes. I couldn't help but wondered if maybe I wasn't hiding the hideous home I live in with that hideous woman, maybe I had been just a bit to open to Alice. Whatever I had said must have worried her enough to tell her husband. That was usually a bad sign. Perhaps they didn't want my company anymore.

"I insist you come in Bella." There was kindness in his voice but I couldn't read his eyes so I looked away instead.

"Yes sir." I murmured and followed him in to the grand house. Nothing had changed, the floors still squeaked and I was still nervous as ever when entering this house. What in god's name could I possibly have to talk about with Mr. Cullen an adult, I don't usually talk to adults, I find them quite stupid and terrible at times. Mr. Cullen led me to the same dining room Alice had, and took a seat right in her place, that serious expression never leaving his eyes. I sat in the same seat I had sat in the first day.

"Would you like something to drink?" He offered giving me a grin; I ducked my head and played with my hand in my lap. Trying to calm myself.

"No thank you sir." I nodded to myself.

"You have quite the manners, not like usually teenage girls today." He chuckled; I could feel his eyes watching me.

"I'm not like many teenage girls sir."

"Did you grow up here?" He tapped the table with his fingers lightly and I lifted my head just to glance at him slightly.

"Yes I did." I stated shortly but unlike I had predicted he didn't ask another question. He stayed quiet and still watching me. Waiting for me to go on I suppose but I would not speak anymore on that particular subject especially with him. He didn't say anything after that just fiddling with his hands on the table and tapping his coffee cup while I waited for him to kick me out. I was a boring person he shouldn't have to be put through this.

"I'm sorry Mr. Cullen, this is weird and its totally unlike me to be so open and rude about these things but I can no longer watch you sit there while I bore you. I can just go back home and see Alice next week." My courage left me speechless and I blushed a deep red before ducking my head.

"It's Edward." He chuckled. "It's obvious you don't like home very much. Or so Alice says and it's not very safe for a lady to be home alone especially at this hour. You don't have to tell me anything or talk about anything; I just insist you stay just until your mother comes home."

I held back the urge to roll my eyes, suddenly I found the charming Mr. Cullen very annoying. At least now I knew I had told Alice too much, enough to make her blab to her husband. When in reality there was nothing to worry about. I had been living this life for a very long time, I had gotten use to it and I now have to live with it. He was no one to say where I should be, or what I should do. He was neighbor that I had spoken to only once. His eyes bore into mine and I didn't argue for some reason I felt as if he knew something I wasn't aware of.

I bit my lip and squeezed my hand looking away from him and down at his coffee cup then back at him.

"Fine." I whispered stubbornly.

"Thank you." His smile was so smug, I wanted to slap it off his face. ..

Neighbors always talking, always watching. When I grew old enough I'd live in the middle of nowhere. No neighbors and no nosy men like Mr. Cullen.

**A/N: THANK YOU SO MUCH. To all of you reviewing it makes me extremely happy :] Please keep reviewing and telling me what you think.**


	4. Chapter 4

Mr. Cullen had allowed me to sit on the couch in the living room, offering me the control to watch TV but I declined the offer and instead just sat on the couch awkwardly. Clearly Mr. Cullen didn't understand me at all, and that was no surprise. His expression would stay curious and confused when talking to me, it was annoying to say the very least. I ran my fingers through my brunette waves, making sure it was at least smooth, and soft. I let all my hair rest on my left shoulder like mother does when she opens a book on the couch but doesn't read it.

"Are you sure you don't want to watch TV?" Mr. Cullen asked a second time as he entered the living room again.

"I'm sure sir." I was too busy running my fingers through my hair to look at him; instead I kept my eyes on coffee table with pictures of people I'd never seen.

"You don't watch TV?" Mr. Cullen insisted on being a terrible adult.

"No sir I don't." I breathed, using two hands now to smooth out my hair.

"You're quiet old fashioned aren't you Miss Swan." He mocked me with amusement, referring to me as Miss Swan. I frowned down at my dress.

"Yes Mr. Cullen I am." I admitted shamelessly, it was clear to anyone who saw me walking down the street. I didn't belong in this time era, I liked to pretend I was supposed to be somewhere else.

"Well you're dresses make its seem like you're from the 60's but you talk as if you're from the 30's. Which one do you favor?" His voice was somewhere behind me and I rolled my eyes knowing he couldn't see.

"I don't know Mr. Cullen. I couldn't say."

There was a long pause and I could not even hear his breathing for a while, just the slow rhythmic heart beat in my chest, and the sound of my fingers weaving through my hair.

"You're an interesting girl Bella."

I let my hand rest in my lap gently, counting to three before I replied.

"Mr. Cullen, can I please go?" I sighed. I could hear his footsteps approaching the couch, and my heart sped up to match his steps. He took a sit right next to me, my leg almost touching his and for some reason it made it impossible to breathe. I stared intently at my hands not daring to look up at him. I might just faint.

I failed and glanced up at him when he did not say anything. His eyes were that smoldering green and his face seemed so much more perfect up close, where I could almost touch it. My hand twitched slightly in my lap.

"You can go, if you promise to come back tomorrow." He smiled a crooked smiled.

"Mr. Cullen what are you talking about?" My eyes searched his face for answers, but I found none and waited patiently for him to explain further, while I counted the perfect lines around his smile.

"Let's just say Alice thinks it would be a good idea if we kept each other company while you're gone."

"I can't just keep you company Mr.-"

"Then I'll offer you the job of looking over Alice's garden each day. Do you know how to garden?" He was determined, my face was covered with my surprise. I nibbled on my bottom lip nervously, and the slight thrill of having something to do other than wait for the hideous presence of my mother filled me.

"I guess." I whispered.

"Great!" He sighed running a hand through his messy bronze hair. "I'll see you tomorrow at noon."

I went home that night feeling slightly dizzy and the smile on my lips refused to fade, I let the moon guide me home, and I ignored the annoying hum of my mother's words for I had to sleep and be well rested for my job tomorrow. I slipped on my night gown and went to my window one last time before I fell asleep. Mr. Cullen had shut off all the lights and only one dim light barely alive flickered softly before dying and letting the dark take over. His room I suppose. I lifted the window open being careful and quite. I opened the drawer next to my bed where I hid a fresh package of Marlboro cigarettes.

I smoked my first cigarette that night.

**A/N: This is actually the rest of the last chapter (: Thank you again for the reviews. What do you think of this chapter, Bella and Edward will be growing quite the relationship. :]**


	5. Chapter 5

"Bella I do not care! You are so ungrateful sometimes." Mother pulled my wrist squeezing the life right out of me, taking my soul; sometimes I was sure she was the devil.

"Those dresses are the only thing pretty about you, now I know why you wear them." She spat pushing me into the car roughly, my elbow scraped against the door and a tear trickled down my cheek but my mouth stayed sealed shut. I wouldn't not allow her one word of mine; I would not allow her any words of mine. She did not deserve it and even if my words are so very little she did not even deserve the littlest. She slammed the car door and finished smoking her cigarette by the trunk. I couldn't wait for her beauty to fade; she would have nothing to hide behind then.

I rubbed my elbow soothingly and let my heart sink as I watched Mr. Cullen's home. The disappointment was sickening, my stomach turned. Tears fogged my vision and I gave up even trying to look, I bowed my head and let my dress soak in the tears. My mother was the reason I would not be doing any gardening today, my mother is the reason I have nothing to be happy about… ever.

I stared at the lines on my palm, tracing them lightly trying to distract myself from the tears that threaten to leak. I didn't dare lift my head when I heard the car door open and my mother enter. The bitter sweet smell of cigarette smoke assaulted me, leaving me almost gasping for fresh air, I twisted in my seat uncomfortably.

"Bonding with the neighbors?" She breathed under her breath as she backed out of her parking space outside out very dull house.

"You think they like you?" She laughed. "No one around here understands you but me."

I bit my lip and squeezed my own hand, it was safe to look out the window now, Mr. Cullen's house was out of view.

"Where are we going?" I whispered listening to the hum of the car instead of her stupid voice. She never answered and I didn't really care.

"Drop me off at the park." I demanded, tears unable to hold themselves back, I bit my lip and tasting the blood on my tongue. My hands held tighter onto each other and I squeezed my eyes closed for a second and my heart stopped. She whispered something too low for me to hear and I swallowed.

"Drop me off at the park!" I yelled over the hum of the car and it silenced her completely, the car is filled with tense air making it difficult to breath and after a sharp turn and a slam on the breaks… we're at the park.

"Get out." She growled and I pushed myself out of the car, slamming the door behind me. She left without another word and I stumbled all the way to an empty bench, where I put my head down and cried. I couldn't hear anything but the sweet song of the birds and the soft laughter of children further away, I heard nothing but sweet sounds and felt nothing but the sun warming my back. I breathed heavy with sobs that shook me and tears that soaked my arm. I thought about how much Mr. Cullen would hate me for not showing up, and how silly I was to think I could ever show up in the first place. I thought of all the things I hate and how they all hate me in return.

I hate my own mother. I wish it was just my adolescent mind playing tricks on me but the hate I have felt for her had grown from just the silliest envy that filled me as a child. Maybe I'm evil like she says, maybe I 'm crazy and need medication, maybe I don't belong in this world at all. I'm so unsure about most things but I know one thing for sure… I hated her, and she hated me because of the same silly thing… envy.

I don't remember father but she does, and I don't remember him loving me but she does.

* * *

"Bella, what are you doing here?" Rosalie's eyes were filled with shock and happiness when she swung open her door, I smiled a small smile and took in her beauty as she stood before me with her deep blue eyes and long silk blonde hair. She embraced me in a tight hug and pulled me into her apartment.

"Hi Rose." I giggled as she released me from her hug but held on tightly to my hand, her excitement reminded me of Alice, someone I missed as well.

"Oh my god you have gotten so beautiful!" She kissed my cheek and squeezed my hand. "Your hair is down to your waist now!"

"Oh I look the same." I blushed and she pulled me further into the tiny apartment with eagerness. She stopped suddenly and spun around pulling me into another tight hug, a hug that filled my heart with warmth, warmth that I realized I had been missing, I didn't linger on that thought for long.

"I'm so happy to see you!" She beamed at me, wrapping me in her arms once more.

"Me too." I smiled a true smile. Rosalie pulled away from me, leaving her hands on my shoulders as she stared me directly in the eyes. Rosalie's beauty would never fade, because she was as decent on the inside as she was on the outside. Something I admired about her since the day I met her. I remembered her tattoo of a red rose on the side of her neck, I remembered the nose piercing and the Betty Page bangs and her Rockabilly style. I remembered it all crystal clear, she hadn't changed a bit.

I hadn't realized I missed her so much till now as she stood right in front of me, her blue eyes gazing ever so happily into mine. I leaned in to kiss her on the cheek, emotion suddenly flooded me and my chest tightened with more tears, tears I hadn't released myself of at the park today.

"I missed you." My voice shook.

"Bella don't cry. You're still so silly." She held me again rubbing my back soothingly only making the tears much worse. The pain throbbed in my chest. I couldn't decide what I was crying about: Seeing Rosalie, My mother… Not being able to garden… Not being able to see Mr. Cullen.

"I know." I choked out.

"Sit." She frowned and led me to her kitchen. Her kitchen looked something like what a mother would have decorated soft colors like baby pink and baby yellow but the empty beer bottles and thousands of plastic cups only reminded me that Rosalie did live here. There was a collection of tall glass bottles with fancy designs displayed by the sink. Rosalie sat at the chair across from me, her eyes were sad and I could feel it was for me. Though I wished no one to ever be sad for me ever.

"What's wrong?" She reached out to place my hand in her palm, I stared at our hands for a while before replying.

"It's just my mom." I shrugged.

"Like always." Rosalie shook her head disappointedly. "I told you, you can move in with me anytime."

"I know, she won't let me go… anywhere… ever." I stared at the pretty table cloth instead of Rosalie.

"She has to, she can't keep you there forever!" Rosalie raised her voice and I flinched.

"If she wants she can." I lifted my head to stare at her again.

"Nope!" Rosalie yelled shrugging. "Won't let it happen!"

"I swear Bella, I'll put that bitch in her place she won't like fucking with me, I'll get you out of there." Rosalie's eyes were hard and serious; I stared into them almost amazed. Rosalie had always been the toughest girl I've ever met yet always the sweetest to me, I could never understand how we even became such good friends.

"I hate her." I sighed sounding so much like a teenager. Silence came upon us and I twirled a piece of table cloth between my fingers.

"You're sixteen now? Huh?" Rosalie smiled winking at me.

"Yeah." I giggled rolling my eyes.

"Any cute boys… or girls?" She raised her eyebrows and a burst of laughter shook my entire body, her laughter was loud with mine.

"No." I breathed coming down from my laughter.

"No? You mean a girl with tits like that doesn't have a boyfriend?"

"Rosalie!" I blushed covering my breast with my hands, she just laughed in response.

"What about you?" I raised an eyebrow knowing, like always, there was more than one guy seeing or sleeping with Rosalie.

She sighed and leaned back into her seat stretching.

"Well there has been a few but no one too special. Roy makes a good fuck buddy but that's about it."

"Hmm." I nodded watching her.

"How'd you get here anyways?" She questioned.

"I walked about 2 miles."

"From where?"

"The park." I shrugged.

"Why were you at the park?" She raised an eyebrow suspiciously.

"My mom remember." I sighed again frowning down at my lap.

"Oh Belly don't be all sad, I haven't seen you in like a month!" Rosalie leaned forward flipping her hair behind her shoulder.

"I know I'm sorry." I frowned again and Rosalie's eyes lightened up with realization, her chair squeaked against the tile as she rose from it and began searching her kitchen cabinets. I watched her curiously wondering what she could possibly be looking for. She came back to the table holding a tall glass bottle of Absolute Vodka, her eyes were bright with excitement, and her grin was smug with mischief.

"Darling, have you ever heard of drinking your troubles away?"

* * *

"Bye Rose!" I practically screamed into the cold damp night, while Rosalie was attacked with a giggle fit as she sat in the driver's seat, drunk… very drunk.

"Bye Bye Belly!" She attempted to blow me a kiss but failed and I laughed so hard my stomach hurt. I stumbled onto the side walk tripping a number of times and getting back up, my breath reeked of vodka and my throat still felt the burn. My vision was blurred and the cool air caressed my skin like magic, I felt so alive so brilliantly alive and living. I touched my hair and mumbled something to myself about insanity and continued my walk to the door.

"Mother's going to kill me." I giggled under my breath as I made it to the door, knocking 3 times gently. The porch light flickered on and I squinted to see, but it didn't help much everything was cool and blurry. It seemed like forever until my mom answered the door.

"Bella?" The silky smooth voice that haunted me called out my name, the soft deep voice belonging to not my mother but my handsome neighbor .

"Mr. Edward" I slurred out. "This isn't my house." I began to giggle uncontrollably.

"Are you drunk?" His voice was shocked; I wished I could see the look on that pretty face.

"The lights too bright." I touched at my eyes and suddenly felt myself falling.

"Whoa. I'll take that as a yes." His voice was in my ear and his arms were tight around my waste, I pulled closer to him.

"Uh huh." I mumbled and held on to something, his shirt I guessed.

I was unaware of what was happening and if I was walking or being carried. I didn't know where I was or why I was so happy, I couldn't make sense of the cool air hitting my body when I remembered being inside and then suddenly warm again. I didn't understand why I could hear my voice mixed with his and not be aware of what I or he was saying.

"Good night." The angel said to me.

* * *

My head throbbed with pain; my mouth dry and stale was in desperate need of water and I knew I was going to be vomiting soon. I rolled around in sheets that were not mine, I assumed that Rosalie had let me sleep in her bed. The night was a blur, and I remembered close to nothing. All I could remember was laughing and laughing and never stopping.

I heard footsteps approaching but they were much too heavy to belong to Rosalie. I began to panic in the sheets hurriedly realizing I might not be at Rosalie's house. After fighting with the sheets and trying to escape I finally found a way out and the rooms brightness made me flinch in horror, I squinted but the burn remained in my eyes.

"Good god!" I used my hands to shield my eyes from the sun, it didn't work as well as planned. I could see the different shades in the room now, and it was nothing I had ever seen before, this was obviously not a room I knew. There was a big mirror hanging on the wall, beneath it was a beautiful mahogany dresser flowing with pink roses and white roses, it was beautiful but it was long before I realized I wasn't the only one in the room.

"Morning." Mr. Cullen stood in the door way dressed sharply as always, smile handsome as always. I clang on to the sheets for dear life and my mouth opened slightly, my eyes bugged out of my head and I could feel the vomit coming. The night flooded my memory and I don't remember how but I remember standing at his door thinking it was my door. I sat up in the bed immediately, and he watched me almost with amusement.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry. This… I-I… I don't know what I was thinking!"

"Hey hey hey, calm down. It's okay." He leaned against the door frame casually.

"It most certainly is not." I groaned, and I was shocked to hear his mesmerizing chuckle.

"I did show up at my house at 1 in the morning and take over my bedroom… but I think we can move past that." He smiled at the end and I simply groaned into my hands. I could feel the blood rushing to my face and my heart beat quicken. This could not be happening.

"Don't worry, it's not that bad. It's not like I'm going to tell your mom. Well only if you plan on not telling me what exactly happened last night." I could hear the smug smile in his voice, and I was sure at any moment I would drop dead or at least I wished I would.

**A/N: Sorry it took so long! Please keep reviewing! What do you think? ;]**


	6. Chapter 6

I tried to ignore him for a long time, I tried to make myself believe he would forget about it and let me go home. Edward didn't, he rested before me calm and collected, shifting every now and then in his seat, sighing occasionally even running his long fingers through his tousled bronze hair. I tapped my foot nervously never gaining confidence to speak till he did.

"So-"

"I just got drunk at my friend Rosalie's house, I made a mistake in houses and that's all." I didn't let him finish, my words were rushed and nervous, my cheeks were beginning to burn. He smirked a tiny bit before taking a sip of his coffee and replying in his smooth, calm, collected voice.

"Why?"

I bit my lip in irritation, but quickly hid it by ducking my head and smoothing out my ridiculously wrinkled dress. If anything was more humiliating then trying to explain anything to Edward, it was sitting before him in a wrinkled dress and fuzzy hair. I softly laid my hands back on the table in front of my tea taking a deep breath.

"I don't know…" I sighed looking up at the door calculating how fast I could run out without him catching me. His next gesture however tied me to my seat, it ran chills up my side, warmth down my body… a tickle in-between my thighs. I analyzed his hand touching mine, so delicately. I watched his squeezed my hand gently rubbing his thumb across mine. My heart was beating out of my chest, blood was flooding my cheeks and suddenly I couldn't even remember one thought.

"You can tell me Bella." It was as if his words were in slow motion, I watched his lips move so smoothly. I was terrified of looking into his eyes, I ducked my head again. All too soon he released my hand and my heart.

"I w-was just m-mad." I stuttered trying to compose myself. I almost felt as if I was going to cry and I didn't even know why.

"At who?" He urged, I saw his hand twitch slightly, I liked t imagine he wanted to touch my hand again; he wanted to make it better. More emotions flooded me that familiar stinging began to torture my eyes. I decide I hate Edward, I decide he's evil for making me say thing I don't want to, I decide I want him to hold my hand. My breathing accelerates and I feel as though I'm going to explode. I grip my dress with one hand and the other lay dead on the table, right where Edward left it. I watch the steam dance out of my tea. I reached forward without looking at him and I grabbed his hand. Edward's hands were smooth but rough, his fingers were long and fine, I traced them with my finger tips taking in a deep breath. My hands trembled slightly as I wrapped my hand around his.

"My mother. I don't get along with her…. I h-hate her. I hate her." Tears begin to form but I try with all my strength to hold them back successfully. I glanced up for the first time into his green eyes letting him see me so weak. A single tear slid down my cheek in silence.

"S-she doesn't like me. She-" I took a deep breath before continuing, I squeezed his hand.

"She told me I sent my father away and when I was younger she use to beat me for it." Tears flowed freely without my approval; my voice became unclear and shaky.

" My ugliness. Inside and Out. I wanted to come by yesterday like you asked, but she wouldn't let me. I'm so sorry." I finally let out one fresh sob and instantly his grip tightens on my hand.

"Don't be sorry Bella, it's okay… It's not your fault." He whispers. His words are like a caress to my heart.

"So many things- are just wrong." I shook my head furiously trying to forget her words. Trying to forget the nothing she's given me.

Edward stayed silent, watching me calm down but never letting go my hand. I stopped the tears and now I looked him dead in the eye, his green orbs were so bright so brilliant. I could not even bare to look away now. I could not even think of that.

"I know Rosalie because she lived across the street once a long time ago & unlike many kids around her she respected me because of my vintage style, somewhat similar to her rockabella style. She became the only friend I've ever had." I sighed and sniffed.

"All because she liked my dresses." I laughed humorlessly. A smirk appeared on Edward's lips and he gave my hand a squeeze.

"When my mother found out I was talking to Rosalie, she thought it inappropriate and rude. She called me a lesbian and made me stay in for a week. Rosalie moved because of financial reasons and I only visited her twice because it's all the way across town."

"Rosalie never tried to visit you?" Edward asked seemingly genuinely curious.

"Rosalie and I are not alike, her life is crazy. She does drugs and smokes cigarettes in public, she drinks, she has boyfriends and friends. I can understand if she didn't have time." I explained looking down at my lap.

"Doesn't sound like the right crowd to be involved in."

"She would never make me do anything like that. I think she cares about me." I try to defend my only friend.

"How'd you end up drunk?" He shifted in his seat and still held my hand across the table.

"She told me it would help." I shrugged. " I didn't do it because she said that… I did it because I like the feeling of alcohol in my system. I like not thinking."

He seemed surprised by this, raising his eyebrow slightly.

"You've tried alcohol before?"

"Yes." I nod once. "Where's Alice, Edward?"

Edward seemed taken aback by the question, I could see him back tracking in his head, his eyebrows twitched.

"Away for the week like I said before.." He trailed off.

"I like her, I consider her my friend too you know." I smiled, remembering her little pixie self.

"Yes she is." Edward said staring back at me with meaningful eyes. "What about us?"

I watched him frozen, trying to understand the emotions, I wished so badly I could read his mind.

"You're my friend too Edward." I stated slowly

"Good." He smiled widely squeezing my hand before letting it go. I raised an eyebrow not understanding what he meant by that. He picked up my tea and headed to the kitchen to rinse the dishes. I sat back in my seat and relaxed repeating his last question in my head.

* * *

My mother hadn't even questioned my absence, she hadn't even said anything, asked me any questions. She simply glanced at me then away out the window watching her life pass her by, letting me weight her down. I could care less anymore…

I smiled as I walked up the stairs to my room, where I would stay for the remainder of the day.

'Friends.' I thought how happy he was to hear we were friends. Holding my hand like that, caressing my thumb. The way it felt, why it felt that way, what it was. I liked these new questions that haunted my every thought, I liked to be given something to wonder about, something to look forward to.

"Bella!" My mother called from downstairs, her voice was hoarse and ugly.

"Yes!" I called back dryly, I could hear her heavy heels dragging up the stairs slowly, finally reaching my room. She stood in my doorway staring at me with eyes so cold a chill went down my spine and I had to look away.

"Mr. Cullen has a wife. You slut."

"Mom!" I screamed bewildered. "Edward and Alice are my friends."

"Just because you feed them lies and they feel bad for you doesn't make them your friends!" She yelled back entering my room further; her face was dark and evil it looked as if she had aged over night.

"Don't ruin this." I stated clenching my jaw, my eyes glared and I curled my fist.

"Or what?" She smirked winking at me.

"Go to hell!" I grabbed the brush sitting beside me and threw it with all my strength hitting her on her side. Her eyes widened, and the bags under her eyes became visible as she glared at me. Almost as if she was growing. Adrenaline coursed through my veins and my heart pumped louder and louder in my chest. I waited for her to come at me but instead she hurriedly left the room never saying another word for the rest of the day.

* * *

I hadn't left the house, too scared of facing my mother downstairs, too scared of her finally attacking me. I stayed in my room and hadn't eaten a thing in two days. I kept praying she would go somewhere but she purposely stayed knowing I wouldn't come down, knowing I would rather starve myself than face her. I sat at my window brushing my hair, trying to distract myself, I glanced at Edward's house ever so often, trying to remember exactly what it felt like when he touched my hand and how he did it, and how he talked to me. I saw his car parked out front, meaning he was inside. I stopped stalking him because I started to creep myself out, I paid attention to the kids playing in the streets, dancing in the sun, their hair a mess in the wind… free.

**A/N: Sorry for taking forever! Hope you like it & thank you for all the reviews! Keep them coming :]**


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